This is important because it helps you to know what is driving you, what you need, and what is good for you at this particular point in your grief journey and life in general.
It’s a good idea to start with sorting out your Motivation.
Do you need to focus on working through your grief more?
Do you need to strengthen a sense of independence and relying on yourself? c/ What strengths or vulnerabilities do I see in myself that tell me I am either ready to date, need more time to heal, or would benefit from building up my sense of independence before starting to date.
You may need to take some time to experience friendships first, before embarking on dating.
Many young widows derive a lot of comfort from connecting with other widows in a support group, either online or in person.
Sort through what your difficult emotions are trying to tell you about what you need, right now.
Some of the most common and most challenging emotions are: Loneliness: Figure out what your loneliness is trying to tell you.
Understanding how you feel emotionally lets you know if you are doing well, are in trouble, or if a situation needs to change.
If you feel you are really stuck in the pain of loss, you may benefit from counselling.
Your Values: Once you have figured out ‘Why’ you want to date, it’s helpful to get clear about your beliefs about dating, especially as a young widow.
Is loneliness part of the grieving process and the necessary working through of the loss of your husband?
If that’s the case, you may need to be further along in your bereavement before dating.
Understand why you feel guilty about the prospect of dating.