After all, women are encouraged to be assertive, accomplished and independent; being told that they’re “intimidating” sounds like they’re being told to take all of that back and pretend to be something less than what they are. Are geek guys finding a woman’s accomplishments to be somehow threatening? Because “intimidating” is so subject to personal interpretation, I thought it was best to go to the source: geek guys.
I conducted an informal (and utterly unscientific) poll on the Dr.
It’s important for you to be aware that others may be fearful of you simply because of the position you hold.
There are ways to overcome this to a degree, but you may not ever be able to overcome “positional intimidation” completely.
Your instinctive response may be to play down your looks, and while this can work – there’s a reason why the “beautiful-after-all” trope exists; everyone likes the idea of the librarian who’s secretly model-gorgeous – it’s ultimately putting the responsibility on you.
Instead, make a point of being approachable and friendly.
2 View All Next »I want to introduce you to someone. She’s geeky to her Joss-Whedon-loving core, a Whovian, Vertigo-reading, 3rd edition D&D (none of that 4th ed crap thank you very much) gamer with the con stories to prove it. While it’s true that many men will use it as a polite dodge to avoid saying “I’m not attracted to you”, when it comes up over and over again, it’s a sign that maybe there’s more to it.
You may also exhibit some subtle behaviors that can cause others to be intimidated.
These may be unintentional on your part, but they can work against you.
When you moderate or eliminate those subtle behaviors, chances are that others will follow your lead willingly and joyously.
Just changing your behavior may not be enough to overcome your intimidating behaviors because if you don’t actually think differently, others will see right through your less-than-genuine behavior.
Instead, begin working on cultivating your mind set in the following areas: Become grateful: What is it that you are grateful for in others?